“For Father’s Day, Daddy would like you to make that lasagna you cooked for us on Mother’s Day.” Source link Read more »
“Would everybody please stop asking me if I have any crazy plans for Flag Day?!” Source link Read more »
“Bear mace, check. Breaking-news mace, check.” Source link Read more »
“There’s no way to opt out of messages in an election season.” Source link Read more »
“No, wait—leave that one up. That’s my campaign poster.” Source link Read more »
“The weather was so nice this weekend I didn’t even have time to binge an entire show.” Source link Read more »
