“Actually, place the spoils at the feet of my adult children. I’m trying to look less corrupt.” Source link Read more »
“Quick! Somebody get Chuck Schumer to write a strongly worded letter!” Source link Read more »
“Great Scott! The past is no longer distinguishable from the future.” Source link Read more »
“No need to worry about our retirement funds—have you seen what these Trader Joe’s tote bags are reselling for?” Source link Read more »
“It’s your bracket—I’m afraid it’s busted.” Source link Read more »
“I called you here to share my ‘White Lotus’ theories.” Source link Read more »
“Is that your ‘thinking about dinner’ look, or your ‘lost in a wordless fog of horror’ look?” Source link Read more »
“Thanks, but I still have at least another month of seasonal depression to go.” Source link Read more »